My sympathy goes out to French first lady Carla Bruni, whose 1996 appearance on a talk show has come back to haunt her via YouTube. Yes, that’s right — she had a fun time on television 14 years ago, joking about hooking up in different countries and reading pick-up lines in multiple languages.

How that moment has any bearing on her current abilities, I don’t know. She’s a singer-songwriter and former model, for chrissakes; I’m sure she didn’t expect to marry the president of France.

What were you doing 14 years ago? Are you the same now? I know I’m not. Nor am I capable of living my life as if my future political enemies are watching, so I’m glad I have absolutely no ambitions to go into public office, civil service, or pre-K to 12th grade education.